A
Age Play: A form of roleplay where the participant(s) act or wish to be treated as a different age than they really are. This can range from a young age (baby) to an old age (grandfather).
Anal Hook: A piece of bondage equipment where one end is inserted into the anus and the other end attached to something else. Often used in predicament bondage.
Armbinders: A piece of bondage equipment that restrains the submissive’s arms behind their back.
Ass-to-Mouth: An activity where an implement is inserted into the anus and after inserted into the mouth. Can be considered a form of degradation.
B
Ball Stretching: An activity where the testicles are pulled away from the body causing pain and/or discomfort.
Ball Weights / Stretcher: Devices that are attached to the testicles that stretch the scrotum away from the body.
Ballbusting (Tamakeri): An activity where the testicles are struck repeatedly causing light to severe pain.
Bastinado (Foot Torture): A form of corporal punishment where the underside of the submissive’s feet are struck with an implement causing sharp pain. Usually performed with a cane.
BDSM: An abbreviation standing for: Bondage/Discipline, Domination/Submission, and Sadism/Masochism.
Begging: An activity where the submissive must ask repeatedly for a certain thing, usually involving self humiliation. Can be considered bratty unless the Dominant asks for such behavior.
Behavior Modification: An activity where the Dominant changes or alters the behavior of a submissive. Can be done in a short-term play setting or for an extended period of time.
Belt: An everyday garment that can be used as an impact toy.
Blackmail: An activity where the dominant demands something by threatening to expose or humiliate the submissive. Considered edge play and requires explicit consent between both participants.
Blood Play: A fetish activity where the sight, taste, and possibly even extraction of blood is seen as erotic. Can take a variety of forms or be associated with vampirism.
Body Worship: An activity where the submissive reveres a part of the Dominant’s body. This can be performed by looking, complementing, or touching.
Bondage: The practice of consensually tying, binding, or restraining a partner for erotic or aesthetic stimulation.
Bondage Tape: Specialized tape that is made specifically for bondage due to it only adhering to itself rather than hair or skin.
Bottom: A person who releases some or all control to a Dominant. Another name for submissive.
Branding / Scarification: An activity where the submissive can be marked through a variety of methods resulting in short-term or long-term body alteration.
Breath Control: An activity where the Dominant controls the breathing of a submissive, usually through strangulation. Considered edge play and very risky.
Bullwhip: Another form of a single tail that is longer, thicker, and creates a more intense sensation. The main difference is that the bullwhip has a piece of leather called the “fall” that sits between the end of the whip body and the cracker.
Butt Plug: A toy similar to the dildo but is meant specifically for the butt due to the flared end. This can be inserted and worn for an extended period of time.
C
Cage: A piece of bondage equipment that a submissive can be confined in. Some are large enough to sleep in and others just large enough to fit into.
Cage Training: A form of bondage where the submissive in confined inside a cage. In some cases the submissive is being conditioned to be in the cage for increasing lengths of time.
Cane: An impact toy that is long and slender, used to strike the submissive. Can be made out of a variety of materials.
Caning: A form of corporal punishment involving the use of a flexible cane. Usually performed on the submissive’s bottom and can leave welt marks.
Castration Fantasy: A roleplay scenario where male genitals are removed.
Catheter: A specialized piece of medical equipment that has been adopted by the BDSM community. It is inserted into the urethra until it reaches the bladder, and then allows for urine to drain without force.
CBT: An abbreviation standing for “cock and ball torture,” which is an activity where the Dominant inflicts pain and/or discomfort to male genitals.
Chastity / Keyholding: An activity where a submissive wears a chastity device that prevents masturbation and the Dominant holds the keys that allow for release. The duration can be short-term or long-term.
Chastity Device: A piece of bondage equipment that someone wears that does not allow for sexual stimulation. The device is locked on and can be worn for an extended period of time.
Collar: A restraint that is fastened around the neck. It can restrict movement and allow for other restraints to be attached to it.
Consent: An agreement between two people that gives permission to engage in a specific activity.
Corporal Punishment: A form of punishment where the Dominant inflicts pain on the submissive. Can also be referred to as “impact play.”
Corset Training: An activity where the submissive is conditioned to wear a constrictive piece of garment called a corset, which constricts the chest and waist to create a more feminine aesthetic.
Crop: An impact toy that is long and slender, often with a leather tongue known as a “keeper” at its tip, used to strike the submissive. Can be made out of a variety of materials.
Crying: A fetish where pleasure is received by crying or watching another cry.
Cuckold: Name for the beta male in a cuckolding relationship/scene. He may or may not receive his own gratification from this type of relationship.
Cuckolding: An activity where a woman taunts and teases her submissive partner by engaging in sexual acts with a man. The submissive usually obtains their own happiness by being treated in such a way.
Cuckoldress: Name for the female in a cuckolding relationship/scene.
D
Degradation: An activity where the submissive is made to feel less than human through verbal, physical, and psychological means.
Diaper Training: An activity where the submissive is conditioned to wear a diaper. Usually associated with adult baby diaper lover (abdl), age play, punishment or degradation.
Dildo: A sex toy, often explicitly phallic in appearance, intended for sexual penetration or other sexual activity. Can vary in shape, size, color, girth, and in variety of other ways.
Discipline Training / Obedience: A form of behavior modification where the submissive is conditioned by the Dominant to behave a certain way. This is usually achieved through corporal punishment.
Dominant: A person who takes some or all control over a submissive.
Dominatrix: A name for a female Dominant. Someone who describes themselves as such is usually a professional.
Domme: Another name for a female Dominant.
E
E-stim Unit: An electric toy that allows for the Dominant to electrically shock the submissive. The top can control the type of shock, the strength, and the duration using the E-stim unit.
Edge Play: Types of activities that are considered more extreme, therefore requiring more communication and frequent confirmations of consent.
Electro-torture: A group of activities where toys that use electricity are used to inflict pain or extreme sensations.
Emotional Sadism or Masochism: A form of play where one receives pleasure by either inflicting (sadist) or receiving (masochist) emotional pain.
Enema: An activity where a fluid is injected into the anus. Usually done for hygienic reasons, it can also be used as a form of humiliation or torture.
Exhibitionism: An activity where one receives pleasure by being viewed in the nude by a group of people. Can also be a form of humiliation.
F
Face Fucking: An activity where the Dominant receives oral sex by forcefully humping the submissive face.
Feeding / Weight Control: An activity where the Dominant feeds or withholds food from the submissive. In the long-term, can be used to change the submissives diet (similar to behavior modification).
Female Supremacy: An ideology advocating a female-dominated society or female-dominated relationships.
Femdom: This stands for female domination and is a type of BDSM where the woman is the dominant.
Fetishist: Someone who has a sexual fixation on a certain object or body part.
Financial Domination: An activity where the Dominant takes financial ownership over the submissive.
Fisting: An activity where the entire hand is used for penetration (anal or vaginal).
Flogger: An impact toy that has many tails. It can create a variety of sensations from thudding to stinging.
Flogging: A form of corporal punishment the uses a flogger to inflict a variety of physical sensations on the submissive.
Foot Fetish: A fetish where one has a strong desire to touch or see someone else’s feet. This can be an asexual or a sexual fetish.
Forced Bi: An activity where two or more submissives are coerced by a Dominant into activities that are considered homosexual. This can be a form of humiliation and edge play.
Forced Feminization: An activity where a Domme dresses a submissive man in women’s clothes as a form of humiliation.
Forced Intoxication: An activity where the Dominant intentionally forces the submissive to be drunk.
Forced Masturbation: An activity where the Dominant controls how the submissive masturbates.
Fucking Machine: A machine that is used to (anally or vaginally) penetrate the submissive. This machine is motorized and the speed can be controlled by the Dominant.
G
Gag: A toy that is usually inserted into the mouth, fastened around the back of the head, and restricts the submissive’s ability to speak.
Golden Showers (Urolagnia): An activity where the Dominant urinates on the submissive and/or forces them to drink their urine.
H
Hair Fetish: A fetish where one has a strong desire to touch or see a Dominant’s hair. This can manifest itself through hair brushing or washing.
Hard Limit: A strict limit defined by someone that is without any room for exploration or experimentation.
High Heel / Boot / Sneaker / Shoe Fetish: A fetish where one has a strong desire to touch, wear, or see others wear a certain type of shoe.
Hitachi Magic Wand: A type of vibrator that consists of a large head that vibrates and a shaft that acts as a handle.
Hood / Mask: A garment worn on the head, usually by the submissive that can be used to remove the submissive’s sense of identity. It can also restrict sight, speech, hearing.
Human Doll: An activity where the submissive is treated like as a living doll to be used for the Dominant’s enjoyment.
Human Furniture / Objectification: An activity where the submissive emulates an inanimate object such as a table.
Humbler: A piece of bondage equipment that forces a person to kneel or squat by restraining their testicles behind their bottom.
Humiliation: A type of activity where the submissive is made to feel humiliated, ashamed or silly through a variety of means.
Humiliatrix: Another name for a female Dominant. Someone who describes themselves as such usually specializes in humiliation.
I
Ice Play: An activity where ice is used to create a variety of physical sensations on the submissive.
Inflatable: A type of toy that can increase in size by being pumped full of air. This can include dildos, gags, and buttplugs.
Interrogation: A form of roleplay where the Dominant interrogates the submissive by asking questions and using scare tactics.
J
K
Keyholder: A person who holds the key to someone else’s chastity device, thus controlling their sexual gratification.
Kidnapping: An activity where the submissive is abducted by the Dominant. Considered edge play.
L
Latex / Rubber Fetish: A fetish where one has a strong desire to touch, see, smell or smell rubber/latex items, especially clothing.
Leather Fetish: A fetish where one has a strong desire to touch, see, smell or smell leather items, especially clothing.
Limit: A term defining someone’s prohibited activities in a play or relationship setting.
M
Masochist: Someone who enjoys painful or humiliating activities. They often need this for sexual gratification.
Medical Play: A group of activities that are used in a play setting but have real life medical uses. Also a form of roleplay.
Menstruation Play: An activity where a Domme uses her menstrual blood during play. Can be used as a reward or punishment.
Milking: An activity where the submissive has their prostate massaged for sexual stimulation, often in order to reach orgasm.
Mistress: A woman who takes on the Dominant role. This is the female equivalent to a Master.
Mummification: A form of bondage where a submissive is fully immobilised with the use of duct tape, saran wrap, body bags, and other similar items.
N
Needle Play: An activity that uses needles to create temporary piercings.
Nipple Clamp: A type of clamp that is placed on one or both of the nipples to create a pinching sensation.
Nipple Torture: An activity that focuses on causing pain to the nipples and breasts.
O
Orgasm Control: An activity where the submissive is teased for an extended period of time and is expected to resist reaching orgasm. Usually involves edging and having multiple ruined orgasms.
Orgasm Denial: An activity where the submissive is forced or forcibly not allowed enjoy the pleasure of an orgasm. Can include the use of pain or lack of pleasurable stimulation.
P
Paddle: A impact toy that is usually heavy and broad. It has a similar shape to that of an oar, and can sometimes be associated with fraternities.
Paddling: A form of corporal punishment where a broad flat object is used to strike the submissive, usually on the bottom. Common items used include paddles, wooden spoons, and rulers.
Pegging / Anal Training: An activity where a woman wears a strap-on to analy penetrate a submissive. Can include training the submissive to gradually accept larger sized strap-ons.
Penis Pump: A toy that is used to temporarily enlarge a penis using suction.
Pet Play: A form of role play where the submissive accepts the role of an pet and is treated by the Dominant as such. Usually roles involve cats, dogs, and ponies but can vary depending on each individual’s fetishes.
Pony Play: A form of pet play where the submissive accepts the role of a pony and is treated by the Dominant as such. This usually involves specialized equestrian fetish equipment, clothing, and mannerisms.
Predicament Bondage: An activity where the submissive is placed either in physical or mental bondage and is forced to make a choice between two or more undesirable options.
Public Humiliation: An activity where the Dominant humiliates the submissive or makes the submissive act in a humiliating manner in front of a group of people.
Puppy Play: A form of pet play where the submissive accepts the role of a puppy and is treated by the Dominant as such. This usually involves specialized fetish equipment, clothing, and mannerisms.
Q
R
Role Play: A group of activities where each person assumes a specific persona and/or mannerisms. In a sense, they are assuming a character to play but in a sexualized realm.
Rope Bondage: A form of bondage using rope to bind a person. This can include simple binding such as wrist ties or more complex binding such as hogties and harnesses.
S
Sadist: Someone who sexually enjoys inflicting pain and/or humiliation on others. They can also enjoy watching others inflict pain or humiliation.
Safe Word: A spoken word or phrase that calls for an abrupt stop to the play scene. This is said by either the submissive or Dominant when someone has reached their limit.
Sensory Deprivation: An activity where the submissive has one or more senses removed to create a feeling of helplessness and possibly to heighten their remaining senses.
Single Tail: A type of whip that can vary in length and usually has a cracker on the end.
Sissy: An ultra-feminine role played by a submissive that includes feminine routines, behaviors, and activities.
Sissy Training: An extreme form of forced feminization where a submissive adopts ultra-feminine behaviors and performs feminine activities under the guidance of a Dominant.
Slave: A person who takes on the submissive role in a Dominate/submissive (D/s) or Total Power Exchange (TPE) relationship.
Slave Training: A more intense form of behavior modification where the submissive is conditioned to behave to the Dominant specific standard. This usually involves the submissive accepting a regimen and is practiced over a longer period of time.
Sleepsack: A piece of bondage equipment intended to fully cover and immobilize a submissive, similar to a cocoon or mummy wrap.
Small Penis Humiliation: A form of humiliation where a person is mocked for the size of their penis.
Snake Whip: This is a hybrid between the single tail and bullwhip.
Soft Limit: A limit defined by someone that is open to exploration over time.
Sound: A specialized piece of medical equipment that has been adopted by the BDSM community. It used to penetrate the urethra.
Sounding: An activity where a specialized metal rod is inserted into the urethra and moved up and down. This is a form of medical play.
Speculum: A specialized piece of medical equipment that has been adopted by the BDSM community. It can be inserted to forcefully open the anus or vagina.
Spitting: A form of humiliation where the Dominant spits on or into the submissive.
Spreader Bar: A restraint that is attached to each leg and forces the wearer to remain at a wide stance.
Strap-On: A garment that allows the wearing of a dildo and the ability to be the penetrator during intercourse.
Submissive: A person who releases some or all control to a Dominant.
Suspension: A form of bondage where the submissive is elevated from the ground and is suspended in air. Common suspension tools are rope, chains, or straps.
Switch: A person who changes their Dominant and submission roles depending on the situation and/or relationship.
T
Tease and Denial: An activity where the Dominant taunts and teases the submissive in a sexual manner but then denies them any form of sexual release or satisfaction.
Tickle Torture: An activity where the Dominant tickles the submissive to the point where it becomes overwhelming.
Top: A person who takes some or all control over a submissive. Another name for Dominant.
TPE: This is an acronym meaning Total Power Exchange, which defines an activity and/or relationship where the submissive releases full control to the Dominant.
Trampling: An activity where the Dominant steps and walks on the submissive. The Dominant can be wearing boots, heels, or may go barefoot.
U
Uniform Play: A form of role play that employs uniform clothing such as police, nurse, and student uniforms.
Urethra Play: A form of play where objects or instruments are inserted into the urethra or bladder.
V
Vac Bed: A piece of bondage equipment intended to fully cover and immobilize a submissive by vacuum sealing them inside.
Verbal Humiliation: A form of humiliation where the submissive is made fun of, called names, or is reminded of humiliating things they’ve done in the past.
Vibrator: Sometimes described as a massager, a vibrator is a sex toy that is used on erogenous zones to produce pleasurable sexual stimulation.
W
Wartenberg Pinwheel: A specialized piece of medical equipment that has been adopted by the BDSM community. When rolled on the skin, it activates nerve endings creating a sharp pain.
Waterboarding: An activity where the submissive is subjected to a form of water torture that emulates the feeling of drowning. Is considered a form of edge play.
Wax Play: An activity where the Dominant uses specialized candles to drip hot wax onto the submissive.
Whipping: A form of corporal punishment where the Dominant can use a variety of whips and methods to strike the submissive. This creates an intense stinging sensation.
Wrestling: An activity where the submissive and Dominant wrestle, with the submissive inevitably being overpowered by the Dominant. Can include aspects of bullying.
Wrist / Ankle Restraints: Restraints that are fastened around the wrists and ankles. They can restrict movement and allow for other restraints to be attached to them.
X
Y
Your Kink Is Not My Kink (YKINMK): A phrase used in the kink community to denote respect for someone else’s kink while stating that this is something one is not into.