What do you seek?
. . . to indulge a curiosity?. . . to explore your hidden desires?. . . to feel the pinnacles of pleasure and pain?. . . to push your body and mind?. . . to give up control?. . . to valiantly serve and submit?. . . to feel fully connected?
Welcome. So you jumped down the rabbit hole and here you are. But you’re not done yet – I have a few more questions for you, my adventurous little traveler:
What does play mean to you? Do you think of silly games with no stakes, of distractions meant to take your mind off life? Or can you see into the primal need we all have for play? Can you see the opportunity play offers for exploration and imagination? Or how even in professional, grown-up settings so very few of us can resist the allure of play?
Perhaps you aren’t sure what play means to you. Perhaps you once knew, but have forgotten. No matter what you think you know, I want to lead you on a journey of self-discovery – of rediscovery – where you will connect with something deep and true within you. During this journey, we will go many places together. Some will feel comfortable and familiar; others will challenge you. Maybe even frighten you a little. But as long as you are honest with me, and communicate what you’re feeling, you will always be safe.
Imagine yourself strapped to my table, encased within a neoprene body bag (or sleep sack). You try to move your hands, your feet, but you cannot. You try to speak, only to mumble into the gag I’ve wedged between your lips. You try to stare up to see where I am, but you are blinded, your sight removed by a thick, padded blindfold. You are my test subject, your senses mine to give and take away as I see fit. I ask you a question – the one you were hoping and dreading I’d ask – and you wonder what’s worse: that you can’t answer me through the gag or that I might just remove it and have you share that secret you’ve been holding on to . . .
When we play, you will have the chance to be someone you’ve never been before — someone you’ve always longed to be, but never been given the chance. Slipping into this role, you will — for a little while — shed the person you are, and set aside all your worries and anxieties. A new self will take shape in the wake of our play together, and with it will come new fascinations and a new focus.
How much you want to lean into this new role, how much fun you want to have with it, is completely up to you. But trust me when I say it is fun to embrace it and that the experiences you have in this role will stay with you long after our play.
Let’s imagine something else. An entire weekend of service and play, with you as the lucky submissive who won out over all others with your fervent displays of devotion and an impeccable resume of obedience. Wearing your collar, hidden under your shirt, and your tight, unyielding chastity cage, you will take on the role of my personal attendant, escorting me as I go about my weekend business: shopping for new exotic lingerie; perusing the latest canes and crops and other titillating toys; stopping for dinner somewhere elegant, dim, and private. How different it is, you think, to share the quiet moments with your Mistress. To joke and laugh, to open up like you never have before. To know you are accepted as you are.
Play is about more than just theatrics – it’s also about intimacy. In assuming fantastical roles removed from who you are in your everyday life, the truest version of yourself is allowed to come forward, untethered from obligation and expectation.
What could be more intimate than revealing that inner truth to someone else? This is why our journey together will be full of moments to take a breather and talk, submissive to Domme, as the people behind our play. These moments of levity will anchor us as we explore deeper and deeper into who you really are . . .
It’s time to exercise that imagination again.
Now, we’re playing a game together, one that I’ve made specially just for you. It’s a game of choices. Each round, you must decide between two paths: something that intrigues but frightens you or a secret desire you’ve never been able to admit. Your eyes dart around my dungeon as you wait for me to reveal the next round. You catch sight of a row of obscene, jutting dildos, and you swallow hard. Then you spot an open drawer of gleaming clamps and intricate steel clips; just by eyeing their metal teeth, you can feel them biting into your skin.
You turn away. That’s when you get a whiff of the perfume wafting out of a mirrored cabinet stuffed deep with frilly dresses and prim uniforms and cases of glammy makeup. It takes you a moment to realize I’m watching you in the reflection of that cabinet with a playful smile on my face. There’s something in my hand and your heart begins to race. Can it be? You’ve been dreading it – waiting for it – ever since our game began. But how did she know? you wonder. Did I give myself away?
You brace yourself and get ready to make your choice.
Everybody plays differently. This is why play is as much about self-discovery as it is about having fun, because it explores the choices you make and your own unique inner worlds. Some people have played many, many times, and want to push themselves far beyond their boundaries, while others have barely played at all and may not even know where to start.
I adore both ends of the spectrum and everything in between. What’s important to me is that you remain open and honest. Submitting – truly giving into submission – means not fleeing from new possibilities but accepting them as you cast aside your need for control. And, as you do, you will find a beautiful truth in your submission that will strengthen rather than weaken you, that will introduce you to new rituals for you to draw upon in times of need.
Once you’ve learned to let go and to accept the state of not knowing that comes with submission, you may even begin to crave the mental bondage of servitude. That is natural and to be expected – we have been conditioned to believe that unless we are in charge at all times our world will fall apart. But it is okay to hunger for submission and to desire the release of forfeiting control; you might even discover that such a position suits you more than any other you’ve ever known.